When your heart stops beating
by leafonthebreeze
Summary: YuffieReno. Yuffie has grown up a bit so sorry if it's kinda OOC. Please Review if u likeddidn't like... set about a year after advent children. ABANDONED Sorry if you were reading this but I realy don't like it, and my style of writing has changed
1. A fine line

A Fine Line

"Hey Tifa?"

"Yea?"

"I know it's like, a good thing that the worlds better and stuff, and Shinra have gone and there are no more bad guys…"

"Yea…"

"But don't you get, like bored sometimes?"

Tifa looks over at me, and immediately I know she doesn't. For Tifa, life kind of began once everything was over. She opened a bar, seventh heaven, took in Denzel and Marlene, and finally, FINALLY, her and Cloud are sort of what you would call together. Sort of.

"Ok, ok, yea of course you don't" I sigh

"Yuffie" says Tifa gently, "you'll find something you love in this new world, and then you won't be bored anymore, trust me" She smiles slightly, and glances up at the ceiling, to where Cloud sits on the floor above reading the kids a bedtime story.

This is all getting too heavy for me, I don't really do serious. Then, in walks _Reno_. God I hate that guy. I mean yea, he's good looking, but MAN does he know it. And he's one of the Turks, who were supposed to be the bad guys I swear. I mean, the others say it's more complicated then that but they seemed like the bad guys to me. Anyway, he still wears the uniform, some dumb blue suit. He has these totally retarded red stripes under his eyes too, and he always has some idiotic girl hanging on his arm, wanting to know about his _horrible_ experiences working for Shinra. I happen to be better looking then all of them put together, but I mostly just ignore him, or insult him, or whatever. However he's been turning up in Seventh heaven WAY too much recently.

The first thing I notice when I walk into the bar is that ninja bitch is there again. She bugs me. I mean, ok, she's hot, but man does she know it. She's also a total basket case. I mean, this bitch is _crazy_. She's obsessed with materia, in a fucking creepy way. I don't really care about taking sides anymore, we were against each other once but I don't usually let that stop me, I mean Cloud can be a pretty groovy dude. Kinda angsty but you know, I can live with that. But this girl is just plain annoying. She also clearly doesn't appreciate my pretty admirable physique. I am sexy, you know? There's no point being shy about it. But some little ninja bitches just don't appreciate true beauty.

I walk in and sit a few stools away, opposite Tifa, the bar maid. Feisty little madam when she wants to be, and pretty hot too. I turn on some of the Reno charm

"Hey there Tifa" I smile, raising an eyebrow.

"Hi Reno" She says, smiling briefly before going back to cleaning the glass she's holding.

"So, how are the kids?" I ask, leaning across the bar, giving my best 'I'm sweet and caring and not trying to get into your pants' smile.

"Oh, you know, they're ok" she says, moving off to another customer.

Now THAT bugs me. Who the hell does this guy think he is coming onto Tifa like that? Her and Cloud and the kids have finally managed to be something like a family, pretty mismatched its true, but they're still family, and her and Cloud love each other. So what this punk thinks he's doing coming onto her I don't know. I mean, there's no way she'd respond, that's just not Tifa, but it still bugs me, a lot. As Tifa moves off to another customer I get up and walk over to him.

"I know exactly what you're up to and it won't work" I hiss in his ear. "Tifa loves Cloud, so keep your stupid stripy face out of it"

"Chill Ninja bitch, just cos your daddy doesn't love you" he says, sounding bored, smiling at Tifa as he does.

Now that gets me mad, I mean, yea me and dad have had our differences but we sorted them out, I think. Well, I hope… But it's nothing to do with HIM either way.

Suddenly I'm on my ass on the floor. Told you she was a crazy bitch, little ninja just shoved me off my barstool. I get up with as much dignity as I can muster, and try to shoot a "poor me getting picked on" face at Tifa, but she's not looking.

"What the hell was that for Ninja bitch?"

"Oh don't get your frilly knickers in a twist; your precious pigtail is intact, although I'd call it more of a rat's tail. What happened, couldn't afford extensions so you had to kill some poor unsuspecting animal?" she says, all in one breath. Ok, now that was childish, but I'm used to comments like that from her, she insults like a seven year old. But no one insults my ponytail and gets away with it. I grab her by the collar, catching her unawares, and throw her to the floor. She gets up and I can see that kinda spark in her eyes she gets when she's mad, it would be sexy if it wasn't for the fact the girls an utter psycho and her anger is usually directed at me.

I jump to my feet and glare at him. So he thinks he can take on the mighty Yuffie does he? It's a shame I don't have my materia with me, but I can beat him fists alone with my ninja skills. I jump and cling to the ceiling for a second, before dropping down onto him. I sit on him and I'm about to punch him in the face when Tifa yells at us to take it outside. She's kind of used to me fighting people, and I bet she wants to see me kick Reno's ass, but it disturbs the customers. I knee him in the groin and run out into the yard round the back of the bar.

Ok now that _hurt_, and no way in hell am I letting her get away with that. I jump to my feet and race after her into the yard, but she's not there. "Must have run away" I laugh out loud. "You WISH" she shouts, jumping out of a bush and slamming my head against the wall. I twist around and punch her in the stomach. She leaps away from me tries to kick me but I dodge.

I grab him by the shirt so he can't get away, but he does the same to me, I guess so if I hit him he can hit me back without me dodging. I glare up at him; he has these really bright blue eyes like Cloud's, its something to do with mako radiation, which is what makes them so strong. His shirt is really soft, but I suddenly realise my knuckle is just brushing his skin, which is even softer, and that his body is kind of warm, and really, really close. Suddenly I grab his hair and pull his head down to me and kiss him hard on the mouth.

Ok, now that I didn't expect, but I am not complaining, cos that girl can _kiss_. I move my hand down to the bare skin on her waist, and pull her closer, as she ever so lightly bites my lip, as our mouths open and the kiss deepens. Our mouths don't fit together quite right and we're kind of out of synch but it doesn't matter.

Just when he's getting into it I pull away. For a split second he's left with his tongue hanging out and his eyes closed, he looks so stupid, he quickly rearranges his features into a look that I think is supposed to be indifference, but is kinda ruined by the fact he's blatantly trying to get his breath back.

"Not bad for a Turk thug"

"Not bad for a ninja bitch"

I can see that got her mad, but before she can hit me I grab her and kiss her again, for a second I think she's going to push me away, but then she runs her fingernails down my spine and kisses me harder and I don't really think anything repeatable for quite some time.


	2. No regrets?

No regrets

I wake up with a bitch of a hangover. I look over at him asleep beside me. His red hair just catches the light, his skin almost translucent. The tattoos on his face stand out bright red against his pale flawless skin. This is about the fourth time we've slept together. It goes like this. He turns up at the bar; we spend the evening bouncing insults off each other, getting steadily drunker, until we're both out of it enough to kiss, then we retire to my room and… well yea you get the picture.

He's pretty good actually, but there's no way I'm letting him know that, so I hold back, don't let myself enjoy it too much. I think this bugs him but he keeps coming back so I'm not complaining. But he never stays. I make sure of it in fact, practically push him out the door, but he never resists. This is good I keep telling myself. You don't want to turn into another one of his little groupies, never let him think you're attached to him. I roll over so I'm not looking at him. It's just casual sex, that's all, casual drunken sex. Keep it on your terms, he's crazy about you (who wouldn't be) but you want to keep it one sided. Everything is going to plan. You wanted something to keep you occupied and here it is. So why do I have to remind myself of this every time I wake up beside him?

She rolls over beside me and I open my eyes. Her back is turned towards me, as usual. I'm struck by how small and vulnerable she looks; it sort of makes me want to protect her. I mean, I know better then anyone how dangerous this world is. I smile slightly, as I imagine the arse kicking I'd get if she knew what I was thinking.

I don't know why I keep coming back. Do 'em then dump 'em, that's my motto, so why do I keep coming back to her? I swear it's like she plans it, get me drunk, screw me, and kick me out the next day. Crazy ninja bitch. There's just one problem, this time, I wasn't drunk. I let her think I was, but I actually only had a couple of drinks. I regret that more then doing it drunk, I mean I'm used to doing it drunk, but this way I can remember all of it, and the way she holds back. I mean, it's embarrassing, the love master Reno, not satisfying a girl? But its true and that bugs me. Maybe that's why I keep coming back, but I'm not sure it is. There's something about this girl that's got me hypnotised and I can't say I like it, nobody headfucks Reno. I roll out of bed.

"Leaving again" She says to the wall.

"I'll stay if you want"

"Just put your clothes back on and leave"

"Wooo, someone's cranky in the mornings" I quip, but I do as she says.

I watch him get dressed out the corner of my eye. His face may be perfect, but his body is covered with scars. I'd ask how he got them, but that really would make me one of his little groupies. I will never degrade myself to that level. That's why I have to push him away. That's why I have to make sure I'm drunk before I do anything. Otherwise I might actually _feel _something.

I walk down the street, heading for the Turk headquarters, or what's left of the Turks. Three of us, hardly the terrifying force we once were. I'm not in a good mood. I can't get her out of my head, the way she kisses, that lip biting thing she does, the way she looks when she's angry. Desperately I try to think of something else. Unbidden, Elena pops into my mind. I shove her away, anything but her. Rule one of the "Brave new world" Reno. You do not think about Elena. I'm not looking where I'm going and some guy knocks into me. I grab him roughly.

"What the hell do you think your doing?"

"I, I'm sorry, I was just…"

"Save it" I snarl, shoving him to the floor. The guy looks terrified. This is better; this is what I'm used to, inciting fear in others. I kick him in the ribs.

"Please," He begs, "I was just going to visit my wife's grave, she died in Sector Seven"

It was like getting punched. I back away from the guy, and duck down an alley. I feel like I've been winded. Another one of my victims. I thought back to that day, up on the plate, setting the explosives, the fight with AVALANCHE, leaving in a pretty sorry state by helicopter, and then the rumble, the crash, and the screams, as the Sector Seven plate crashed into the Sector Seven slums, killing thousands of people, all because of me.

"You were just following orders" I tell myself, its not like it was your idea. Yea, but I didn't have to. I would have been killed, but what's my life against thousands of others? Still, they would have just got another poor sod to do it. I straighten up and shake my head. Rule two of the new Reno, the one I created for myself after meteor was destroyed: you don't dwell in the past. No regrets just live each day as it comes. I straighten up and go on my way.


	3. Intuition

Intuition

A few days later I'm sitting at Rude's house. Rude is my work partner and probably the closest thing I have to a proper friend. He accepts and understands the new Reno, he knows why I do things, and doesn't ask questions. Basically he understands me.

"She's just so ANNOYING" I burst out.

"The ninja?" he asks

"Yea" I sigh. "It's like, I give her all I've got but it's not enough"

"Maybe she wants more then sex?" offers Rude

"She doesn't seem like the kind of girl who would."

"Well maybe you read her wrong. Maybe she wants the romance, you know, flowers, dinner, all that shit."

"Well, maybe" I usually save that kind of treatment for someone _really _hot who didn't quite fall for the charming man-whore approach. But what the hell, if it will move us on from drunken scuffles then it's worth a try. I would actually like to get to know her, see what goes on inside that whacked out head of hers, what makes her tick, something other then sex. I guess Rude understood that. This is why he's my best friend.

So, I spend the next two days trying to procure some flowers. No mean feat I can tell you. True, the planet is beginning to heal, but that doesn't mean flowers are just popping up anywhere. I finally get my hand on some, and head off to the bar, its chucking it down, but I'm worried if I hang around the flowers will wilt. Seriously, this bitch had better be grateful.

I'm in the bar chatting to Red XIII who's come over for the day. I like him; he's really wise, good to talk to. Not quite what you'd expect from a big red dog, but then first impressions can be deceiving. Then someone else who could be described as a big red dog walks into the bar. He's carrying a bunch of flowers. This sends my head into overdrive. Thought one: Are those for me? Thought 2: Of course they are, you see anyone else as good looking as you in this bar? Thought 3: OMG HE ACTALLY CARES! Thought 4: No he doesn't, he's just trying to win you over so he can satisfy his ego as "The great love god Reno" and ditch you. Well he's not getting to me that easily.

"Hey Reno-tard, who are the flowers for? You better not be after Tifa again, you want your ass kicked like last time?" He rolls his eyes.

"Actually Yuffie, they're for you. I thought maybe we could go grab a bite to eat somewhere"

I'm tempted, but I don't know what to say.

"And you know, we could always go back to my place after…" he adds suggestively.

Dammit Yuffie you almost let him in. You should trust your intuition, you're a ninja, you're always right. I raise one eyebrow, mimicking his trademark smirk.

"Nice try asshole, no I don't want to become one of your little groupies, so you can go recycle those (I point to the flowers) on one of them."

I see the shock and hurt in his eyes, and instead of triumph I just feel evil. Then he recovers his composure, or tries to.

"Fine, maybe I'll go do that" he says quietly.

Then he turns, and walks out into the rain. I stay frozen to my seat a second, and then run to the door. Lying on the road outside the bar where he dropped them, are the flowers, they're red, almost the colour of his hair, and suddenly I realise they're real. It's been so long since I've seen real flowers (apart from Mako flowers but they're kind of ugly I've always thought) I just assumed they were fake. Those can't have been easy to find. I look down the road; I just catch a glimpse of him as he turns the corner, head down, shoulders hunched, a picture of misery. I want to run after him, tell him sorry, that I'll go for a meal, that I'll go anywhere with him if he'll just laugh and be all full of himself and be Reno again. But then a little voice pops up in my head.

"Is he really miserable? Or just pissed he didn't get to fuck you this time"

I turn, and go back inside.


	4. Accidents

Accidents

After the whole flowers incident, I try to convince myself I've done the right thing, but I still feel guilty. Guilt and self doubt are not emotions I'm familiar with, and I really don't like them. For the last couple of days there's been no sign of him, so I finally convince myself it's over, he's fucked off, and this was exactly what I'd planned all along, and get steadily drunker in the bar. Then, in he walks, and I forget all my promises I made to myself about ignoring him.

"So you finally decided to show your face" I joke.

"Fuck off Yuffie" he replies, without even looking up, sitting down a couple of seats away from me.

Well that's nice. See Yuffie, you were right. He's an arsehole. I ask Tifa for another drink, and down it. I can feel Reno's eyes boring into my back, and look around for something to distract me. I see Vincent sitting in the corner, staring moodily into his glass; he seems pretty out of it. Me and Vincent used to get on pretty well, we were sort of the outsiders, just along for the ride, everyone else had these deep reasons for fighting, we just didn't have anywhere else to go. I stagger over and collapse on the chair beside him.

"Hey Vince" I smile, trying to focus on his face. He turns to look at me with those piercing red eyes.

"Good evening Yuffie" he replies, in that hoarse voice of his. It's actually sort of sexy, in a vampire sort of way. I shuffle closer to him.

"So, where you been?" I ask brightly. He surveys me coldly, but I get the feeling he's having as much trouble focusing as I am.

"Places" he mutters, looking away from me. He's so mysterious, it's strange. I'd say I probably know him best out of our little group, but I still barely know him at all.

"Really Yuffie? Am I so cold?" he whispers, turning away, and with embarrassment I realise I had been speaking aloud.

"No, no your not, it's just, like, we know so little about you, well I, I mean…" I peter out. His eyes are hypnotising, they sort of remind me of fire materia. Actually, they sort of remind me of a certain young man's hair, one whose eyes I can feel burning into my back, but I push those thoughts aside, and lean in closer.

"Maybe," I say slowly, making sure I pronounce all the words right, "You need to _open up _more"

The words have the desired effect, as I see the implications of what I just said dawn on his alcohol-dulled mind. Slowly, he leans down and kisses me, putting one hand round my waist and runs the other through my hair and down my cheek. His touch is cool, as if he's just come in from standing in a cold wind rather then sitting in a warm bar for several hours. His mouth too is like a cool glass of water. The sensation could have been quite pleasant, but the hand round my waist is made of metal and gears, and the red headed man on the other side of the bar is watching our every move, but somehow I just can't pull away, I just helplessly kiss him.

Suddenly breaks off and pushes me forcefully away. "Lucretia!" he gasps hoarsely, and his eyes are wild and full of a deep, unending pain. He pushes past me and stumbles out the door. I turn, and see Reno has already turned away, and is staring moodily into his glass, which from the looks of it he hasn't drunk from. I stagger over to the bar, where Tifa takes one look at me and hands me a pint glass full of water. I down it and she hands me another. After three, I feel slightly more level headed, and I realise how stupid I've been. Vincent is fragile; we all know that, which is why we tend to send someone from our group to follow him whenever he goes on his travels, to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. I go outside and take deep breaths of night air, trying to sober up. It's a full moon, and silhouetted against it is Vincent, who is sitting on the roof of one of the houses. His ragged cape blows out in ripples behind him in the breeze. I guess I really should apologise, something I HATE doing, but for now I'll leave him to his thoughts. I don't know how long I stood out there, but it was long enough to sober up.

"Bit cold out here isn't it?" says a voice. I turn, and there he is, leaning against the wall beside me, staring up at Vincent.

"Looks like you fucked his head up pretty bad"

"I didn't mean to, I was drunk, I just, I care about him, really I do, but not like that, not really, and I _know _how much he's been through, and I _know _I shouldn't have I just…" Suddenly everything that's happened in the last few days hits me, and I burst into tears.

I don't know why I followed her out, but her crying scares the shit out of me. She's always been so strong, so independent, so _Yuffie_. Without even thinking, I put my arms around her, praying it will make her stop. She curls up against my chest, still crying. I pull her closer to me.

"Don't" I whisper desperately in her ear, as each tear cuts into me like a knife, as I feel the barriers I put up, the "new Reno" begin to dissolve. Desperately I brush away the tears from her face, but they keep coming, and soon I can't help it, I move my face to hers and kiss them away. She moves her hands around my neck, as I drag my lips across her skin, from her face to her mouth. She pulls me closer and runs her fingers down the side of my face, and following their path with her lips. I stroke the inside of her arms as she does, as I forget everything but her skin, her lips, her taste.

The feeling of drowning overcomes me, this is where I always made it violent, took control, to stop myself falling in too deep, I'm too tired, too dead to do that now. My thoughts are filled with him, and only him. One last thought crosses my mind before I am lost to him completely

There is nothing else but here, and now, and us. There is nothing else in the world but this.


	5. Life lessons

Life lessons

I don't know how long we were out there, lost in each other. Soon her kisses get more urgent, and she runs her hands down my chest to rest on my belt buckle.

"Do you want to take this upstairs?" I murmur in her ear.

She nods fiercely, and pulls me inside and up the back stairs that lead to the bedroom, her fingers digging painfully into my arm. On the landing she pulls me to her and kisses me violently, then runs to the end of the corridor and into her room. I follow more slowly, touching my lip, which feels slightly bruised. When I enter the room she is kneeling on the bed, her shoes and socks thrown on the floor, gazing at me with burning intensity, with the moon reflected in her eyes.

He sits on the bed and takes of his shoes and socks infuriatingly slowly. Then he turns to face me, and his eyes are like unending pools of water in the moonlight. I reach out a hand and gently run a finger down the tattoos that trace his cheekbones, and he closes his eyes and tilts his head, enjoying it. He takes my fingers and kisses them one by one, the puts his arm around me, and places his lips softly on mine. Slowly we fall back onto the bed, as he shifts so he is completely on top of me. His hips dig into my thighs, and the familiar weight of his body makes it slightly difficult to breathe, but I don't care, as I kiss him with renewed urgency, pulling of his jacket, and running my hands through his hair, knocking off his goggles. He picks them up with one hand and throws them off the bed, still kissing me. I then start to undo his shirt, its softness reminding me of that first night out in the yard. He runs his hands under my top, pulling it off.

We break apart for a moment, and stare at each other's topless bodies. His skin is pale in the moonlight, each scar picked out in white. He raises an eyebrow at me.

"First time sober. Well, with me anyway "

"Scared?" I taunt.

His eyes are unreadable, as he pushes me back onto the bed, and slides a hand down my waist, running one finger just below the waist of my belt until he comes to the button. Then he moves his lips as close to my ear as possible without actually touching it, his breath making my spine tingle.

"Never" he whispers, and undoes the button. He runs his hands down my thigh, bringing the shorts with them, and pulls them off. I undo his belt and he kicks off his trousers himself. We remove our remaining pieces of clothing ourselves, and gaze on each other, naked in the moonlight.

"Last chance to back out" I tease. In response, he forces his lips against mine, pushing me down on the bed, and we melt into each other.

He plants hard, forceful kisses against my neck, and I respond by gently biting his earlobe, just below the earring. He runs his hands everywhere, and I respond, mirroring his actions on his own body. It feels strange, not to be drunk, and violent, and forceful, scary but at the same time, amazing. As my enjoyment grows, my fear does too, this was the point where I always seized up, let him get it over with a quick as possible, didn't let myself enjoy it for fear of being taken for granted. But then I feel his gently push my hair out my face, and I realise I don't want to hold back, I don't care anymore, I just want to let him take me over.

As things get more intense, my lips part and I find myself gently moaning his name, something I've never done before. He stops, and I open my eyes expecting to see him smirking, but am greeted with an expression of surprised joy.

"Yuffie" he breathes, before kissing me hard, his tongue searching for mine, with movements mirrored in the movement of our bodies. I kiss him back, and lose myself to the rhythm of our bodies.

I roll off her, breathing hard, and gently kiss her hairline. She shivers, and I pull the covers over us and draw her into my arms.

"Why the hell haven't we done that before?" I ask her

"We have, or were you too drunk to remember" she replies, grinning tauntingly at me.

"Oh you know what I mean" I roll my eyes, but I don't want to argue with her, not tonight. She settles down beside me and lets out a comfortable sigh.

"Goodnight" she says simply, wriggling herself into a comfortable position in my arms.

When I wake up it's still dark. I'm slightly cold, and I realise he's no longer holding me. He's rolled over, facing the window. I sit up, and see the moon reflected in his eyes, and know he's still awake.

"Reno?" I whisper.

When he turns to face me, the look in his eyes is terrifying. It's full of pain and fear, and guilt.

"I don't deserve you Yuffie, I don't deserve anyone"

"Well, true you don't deserve me, no one does, but I would have thought anyone would be pushing it a bit" I joke nervously

"I killed them Yuffie, all those people, they're dead because of me" he says hoarsely, and for a second he reminds me of Vincent.

"We all killed Reno. It's what we had to do. Doesn't matter whose side you were on, or which was the right one, we all killed. You just have to live with it."

"Not like me. No one killed like me. Not an entire suburb"

"What are you talking about?"

"Sector Seven, all those people killed, that was me. I dropped the plate."

I digest this for a second. So Reno was one of the Turks that had fought AVALANCHE on that fateful day.

"Well" I say, thinking. "I'm from Wutai. Midgar always was a symbol of oppression to me. So it doesn't change how I think of you."

"Really?" he asks hollowly.

"Really really" I say seriously. He manages a smile.

"Doesn't it ever haunt you?" he asks. "All those people whose lives we took away?"

"Sometimes. But we have this motto, Barrett came up with it, well, it's more of a way of life. It's, 'Don't just take, prove you know how to give'. It gets me through, it gets all of us through, I think."

He doesn't say anything, but the look fades slightly from his eyes. I put my arms around him, and he lays his head on my chest, his hair tickling my neck, and we sleep like that, lost in each others thoughts.


	6. Confusion

I am woken up the next day by her getting up. I roll over and open my eyes.

"Oh hey sleepyhead" she smiles, "I got bored of waiting for you to wake up. I'm gonna go have a shower."

That really wakes me up. "Mind if I join you?" I ask, sitting up. She looks surprised, and then grins.

"If you want" she says indifferently, walking into the en suite bathroom.

I get into the large shower and turn on the water. I wonder if he's actually going to join me, or if he was just joking. My question is quickly answered by a pair of hands which close around my waist. I turn around as he pushes me against the wall of the shower, pressing his mouth hard against mine. The tiles are cold against my back, but his mouth is warm, as is the water from the shower that's running over us, mingling with the kiss. He breaks away and grins. I roll my eyes and pick up the soap.

"Let me do that for you" he says, a wicked gleam in his eye

"YOU might not be capable of washing yourself, but I definitely am" I reply, sarcastically, although I'm wondering what his game is. His hair has been flattened into his eyes by the water; he looks so funny, and kind of sweet, peering out from under his dripping hair. He softly but firmly takes the soap out my hands, and rubs it in his own, then pulling me close, runs his soapy hands all over me, kissing my neck as he does. He gets quite soapy himself in the process, and his skin feels amazing as it slips against mine. When all the soap is rinsed off, he suddenly pulls away from me and leaves the shower, winking at me as he does. I follow him out the shower and am immediately am swamped in one of Tifa's giant towels she bought for all the guest rooms, one of the reasons I love staying at Seventh heaven. He wraps us both up in it, then pulls me out the bathroom and collapses on the bed with me. We both have the giggles by this time, and for quite a while we just lay there in each others arms, giggling hysterically.

We end up telling each other funny stories. I tell him about how Aerith once had to dress Cloud up as a girl so they could sneak into a brothel to rescue Tifa, and then it turns out Tifa didn't need rescuing after all. Apparently they got Cloud a specially made dress and a wig and everything.

"Aerith told me that one; I laughed so hard I stopped breathing and got hiccups." I tell him, smiling at the memory.

"Aerith…" wasn't she that Ancient? We were always being told to kidnap her, never managed to hold onto her though" he muses. "What happened to her anyway?"

"She… got killed. By Sephiroth" I reply sadly. "I still miss her every now and again, she was a good friend. She was the one who kind of made me feel welcome when I first joined AVALANCHE." He looks away, and I feel horrible for ruining the mood. "Still!" I say, trying to sound brighter. "Everything's over now. Sephiroth's gone, Kadaj and his gang are gone, even geostigma is gone. So no one has to die anymore, or at least, not until they're really, really old. And Cloud says Aerith guards the lifestream now" He smiles.

"Yea, your right. No point in moping about the past." He sighs, then says brightly "Anyway, I have to go now, but I'll come back as soon as I can okay?" He gets up and starts getting dressed.

"Yea, you have to go, you ALWAYS have to go" I say bitterly, and suddenly I feel like I'm gonna cry, it seems so stupid, so I force it back and attempt a smile.

"Sorry, I know you have stuff to do. I guess I'll see you"

"Count on it" he says with a soft smile. He bends down and softly kisses my hairline, sending tingles over my scalp, then walks out the door, turning back to smile at me before leaving.

I sit on the bed for a couple of seconds after he leaves, then jump up and dress at double speed. I'm gonna follow him. Just to, you know, confirm he's genuine. Well, actually it's because I don't want to let him out my sight ever again, but that sounds sort of pathetic… Well, either way, I'm following him. Besides, it's been ages since I've had a chance to put my ninja skills to good use. I open my window and drop into the street below. I spot him at the other end, just before he turns the corner. I sprint down to the end of the street, stopping just before I turn, then press myself against the wall and slowly slide round. He's not looking back so I quickly duck behind a dustbin. I creep along after him in the shadows, not letting him out my sight for a second. I'd forgotten how fun it is stalking people. Back in Wutai I used to do this to tourists all the time.

As I make my way to Rude's house, I feel lighter then I have in a long time. Normally, when I'm walking around Edge, I'm, well, on edge (man I'm funny) but today I don't think I look over my shoulder once.

Rude opens the door as soon as I knock, but then he doesn't have much to do these days. Well, neither do I, but at least I know how to make the most of free time. I collapse on his battered armchair as he hands me a beer.

"You seem in a good mood" he comments. I wish he'd take those sunglasses off; it makes it damn hard to know what he's thinking. But it's Rude, you know? I can tell him pretty much anything, truth or lies, and he won't judge really.

"Things are getting better with Yuffie" I say, smiling.

Rude raises his eyebrows. Well, I guess it is kind of unusual for me to mention a girl more then once.

"What happened to 'Do 'em and Dump 'em' then?" he asks.

"I don't know, well, she's just, different, you know?" I mutter.

"Like Elena?" Rude says softly.

It's like being stabbed it really is, and I should know, having been stabbed on more then one occasion. I suppress the urge to shout. He should know, he should understand, he's my best friend, he should know rule number one of the New Reno, Never mention Elena. But I guess the New Reno got a bit lost last night. But if that means I have to think about her... But no one else knows about her, about us, just Rude. Around him, I'll just have to be different. I take a deep breath.

"No, nothing like Elena." I try hard to keep my voice from shaking. She's just a ninja bitch. That's all. Bit of fun. Elena's different. She'll never be Elena."

Rude looks like he's going to say something, but he's interrupted by a huge crash from outside. We both jump to our feet, and rush to the window. Rude opens it and jumps out (luckily we're on the ground floor) and I follow. There, curled on the ground along with a good portion of Rude's drainpipe, is Yuffie. She scrambles to her feet, and stares at me, her eyes huge and full of hurt and betrayal. Her knees are grazed, she's covered in mud, and she has a cut down her cheek.

"You, you…" She's lost for words, and I can only stand helplessly as I realise she must have heard everything.

"I HATE YOU!" She screams, sounding like a little kid, which I guess she still is sometimes, then turns and runs, over the fence at the back of Rude's garden and away. I watch her go, and every part of me is screaming to run after her, to tell her I didn't mean any of it, that I was just scared, to get down on my knees and beg for forgiveness. But Rude is standing beside me, watching me, and I can't be weak in front of him, not now. He might mention Elena again and I can't cope with that.

"Crazy little ninja bitch" I shrug, and follow him back inside.


	7. Masks and delusions

**Masks and Delusions**

Once I'm safely back in my room, I throw myself down on the bed and cry. So he was just a bastard after all, just using me all along. "She'll never be Elena" he'd said, I guess she must be his actual girlfriend. I dimly remember a girl with cropped blonde hair, the youngest member of the Turks. I hadn't seen her for a while; I guess she must be away on business or something, so Reno decides to have some fun while she's away. It all made perfect sense.

I stop crying when I get the hiccups. Last time I cried like that was when my father took all my materia away, as punishment for attacking one too many tourists. That was when I decided to run away. I mean, I love Wutai, but it wasn't really Wutai anymore, not since my bastard father turned it into a bloody tourist attraction. Anyway, I loved being a materia hunter, being independent, it was fun. In fact, why should I hang around in this God forsaken town when I could be out on the road again, liberating foolish travellers of their precious materia. I sit up and rub the last tears from my face. Since when did the great ninja Yuffie go to pieces over a good for nothing Turk? I roll of the bed and go into the bathroom. My arms and legs are all muddy, but the cuts have stopped bleeding, they were only shallow. I mop myself up with a flannel and run my fingers through my hair. The cut on my face is a shame, but it hardly ruins my natural beuty. In fact, it adds a bit of, I don't know, danger. Perfect for a beautiful deadly materia hunter like me!

I'm feeling a bit better already, as I walk back into the bedroom and open my wardrobe. I rummage around in the bottom and pull out a heavy metal box, a worn our satchel and my shuriken. I sit back on the bed and open the box, and my face is lit by the soft glow of materia. I tip them out onto the bed and pick them up one by one, admiring their soft glow, the smooth feel of them on my palm. I pick out my best and most powerful pieces. I slot some into the shuriken and store some more in my bag. The rest I put lovingly back into the box and put it away. I have quite a bit of Gil saved up, so I should be alright for food. There's only one thing left. I open the drawer of my bedside table and take out my headband. I go over to the mirror and tie it round my head. I grin as I look at my reflection, beautiful, but there's anger ad determination there too. I'm a ninja once again.

I open the door and nearly jump out of my skin. Tifa is standing right outside it, ready to knock.

"Aaah! Oh, Tifa, hi! I've got something important to tell you!"

"Me too" she smiles "you go first"

I puff my chest out proudly. "I'm leaving" I announce. "I miss the materia hunter's life. I need to be out in the wild, running free, independent, you know the drill" Her face falls and I feel kind of bad. I guess she must be lonely since Aerith died, I mean, they were best friends. She has Cloud, but guys, as I have just learned, are dickheads. She tries to smile but I can see she's faking it.

"Vincent's leaving today as well!" she says, a little too brightly. "You could travel together!" I know what that means, that's code for, it's your turn to baby-sit his royal misery-guts and make sure he doesn't wander over a cliff or shoot himself "cos he'd rather feel pain then nothing at all" or whatever. Then I remember last night (it seems so long ago now) and go red. I guess I do kind of owe him an apology.

"Um, yea sure" I mumble, and turn to go down the stairs. Then I remember. "Hey, Tifa, what did you want to tell me?" I ask

"Oh, that" she says, looking at the floor, but smiling slightly despite herself. "I'm pregnant"

"What!" I scream. "You mean, Cloud, but, the mako, how?" A side effect of Mako treatment is impotence, at least that's what I'd been told, the last thing I need is to be stuck with a little ginger baby arsehole I tell myself, although I can't help the weirdest little twinge in my chest somewhere at the thought.

"I'm not sure I understand it, but I think something Hojo did in his experiments counteracted it in some way." she sighs. That's what the doctors said anyway. Cloud believes it's a gift from Aerith"

Now that sounds pretty harsh to me, and just like Cloud. I mean, the woman who has loved him his entire life basically is pregnant with his child, and all he can think about is Aerith, who was in love with Zack all along anyway. Told you men were arseholes. But I don't say anything, I mean, Tifa's over the moon and not even I'm THAT tactless. And it is pretty cool; I mean that practically makes me an aunt.

"That rules!" I grin. "If it's a girl you HAVE to name it after me ok?" She smiles.

"Maybe Yuffie, maybe. Anyway, you'd better go if you're going to catch Vincent"

"Oh yea..." I run over to her and squeeze her tight. "Congratulations" I tell her. "I'll be back before its born I promise"

"It?" she says, raising an eyebrow and smiling slightly.

"Oh you know what I mean" I yell over my shoulder as I run downstairs. Cloud is working at the bar.

"Oh my God Cloud Tifa just told me that RULES!" I scream at him. He looks up at me and gives me one of those creepy little smiles of his.

"Thank you Yuffie" he replies, then, "You going somewhere?" he adds, noticing my bag.

"Um, yea, I'm joining Vincent on his travels" I say nervously, it's still creepy when he stares like that, and his eyes are too similar to Reno's for my liking. I'm kind of running on a high right now and if I let myself think I know I'm just going to lose it. Luckily, not thinking is my speciality.

"He's just left" says Cloud. "If you run you should catch him up"

"Ok thanks! And congratulations again! And you had better be nice to her from now on or I'll tell Barret! Better still, I'll beat you up myself!" I yell at him as I run out the door.

Sure enough, Vincent is slowly plodding along the street. Sometimes we follow him in secret, but to be honest I need company, even if Vincent is hardly the best at idle chit chat.

"Vinnie! Hey Vincent! Wait for me!" I yell, running after him. He turns round and surveys me with those creepy red eyes, and I remember last night and blush again.

"Um, I, um, I'm sorry about last night, you know, I was drunk, and well, sorry" I mumble. He makes a noise in his throat that I take as acknowledgement.

"Anyway" I say brightly, shooting him one of my trademark winning smiles. "I'm travelling with you! Isn't that great!"

"I am going to Kalm. You can follow if you must" he says emotionlessly. Well, its better then being driven away by that gun of his I suppose. It's easiest to be hyper and random and not think with Vincent, because he treats you the same however you act. Hyper random Yuffie does not get miserable over stupid Turks. Now I just have to keep this up till Kalm. After that, well, I should have forgotten him by then.

I make my excuses and leave Rude's as soon as I can, but at least an hour has passed. I run to Seventh Heaven. I have to find her, I have to explain, tell her I'm sorry, something, anything. I can't forget the way her eyes looked when she'd screamed at me. I burst into the bar, it's empty, and Cloud and Tifa are behind the bar, she's curled up against his chest, and he has his arms round her, but he's staring into the distance. None of that really matters to me though.

"Where's Yuffie?" I demand. They spring apart, blushing. I must look like I've lost it, I can tell from the looks on their faces.

"Didn't she tell you?" said Tifa sounding confused. "She left about an hour ago. She's travelling with Vincent; I don't know where they're going. She said she missed the materia hunter's life."

So, she's gone. I deserve it I suppose; I never did deserve her in the first place. Tifa is looking at me pityingly. Pity, I don't need pity. With an effort I shrug my shoulders.

"Oh well" I say, as calmly as I can manage. Then I turn and walk out. I feel empty, like there's nothing to live for anymore. I'm woken from my reverie by my mobile; I flip it open, and am greeted by the smooth, powerful voice of Rufus Shinra.

"Turks" he said, and for a second it's just like the old days, before everything fell apart, when we are a force to be reckoned with, not just me and Rude and a guy playing president. "We have a mission"

It's all he needs to say. I close the phone and flag down a passing car. I open the door and pull the driver out.

"Turk business, obstruct and you will suffer" I say grimly. I get in and slam the door, then speed off down the road, towards Rufus, towards my job. You're a Turk Reno, I tell myself. That's all that matters. Your job is your life.


	8. Mostly Memories

"Soooooo how long do you think it will take to get to Kalm? What will we do when we get there? Do you mind if I liberate some materia on the road? Will you HELP me liberate some materia on the road? I mean, only if we happen to bump into anyone, we don't have to go LOOKING for it, unless of course, you want to… Hey Vincent, do you want to go looking for materia?"

He doesn't say anything, but raises his cape slightly, showing off his impressive array of guns, and looks at me out the corner of his eye. I'm about to ask if he heard me but think better of it. I've been threatened with those guns before, I don't think he was serious but you can never tell with Vincent. So I shut up, for now at least.

I press my thumb against the fingerprint scanner at the door to Rufus's place. It's a fairly smart house on the edge of town, not exactly Shinra manor but it's not bad. I open the door and walk down the hall into his living room cum briefing room. Rufus is sitting on the sofa, looking impeccable as always in his usual white suit. Rude is standing next to him, looking like a bodyguard.

"Ah Reno, last again. I see little has changed since we last met." says Rufus, raising a perfectly shaped eyebrow.

I'm about to point out that there's only two of us here, but then I remember, this is all there is now, there's no Tseng to tell me off, and no Elena to make me laugh as she stands up straight and tries so hard to be professional and not laugh at the faces I'm pulling at her. I stand up a little straighter.

"Sorry sir" I say blankly.

He stands up, instantly commanding the room.

"As you know, since mako energy has become obsolete, many people claim oil is the way forward. Now, currently, any oil discovered is automatically under the ownership of the one who discovered it. You can see how disorganised this will become. I believe there is the potential for one company to monopolise the industry. I believe Shinra should be that company. I also understand this may take some persuasion… He looks pointedly at me and Rude. We get the hint.

Our first monster appears a little way out from edge. It's an ugly looking thing but shouldn't be hard to beat. Vincent cocks his gun and shoots. The monster backs off a bit, but doesn't go down. I've been dying to use my materia for ages, so I ready a fire spell. The familiar green light envelops me as I send out a fire3 spell that totally envelops the monster… and very nearly Vincent. He just manages to jump out of the way as the flames spurt past him. He sends a last shot into the monster and it dies. I turn to grin at him, then notice the flames creeping up his cape.

"Shit Vincent! You're on fire!" I yell. He turns in alarm, noticing the flames for the first time. "Don't worry I've got it!" I shout, casting the water spell as I speak. Water materia was a very rare little beauty I got off an explorer who probably didn't know how to use it.

"Yuffie don't!" Vincent cries in alarm, but he's too late. A jet of water streams out and soaks him, extinguishing the fire. I lower my arms and look over to him, expecting a thank you at the very least. I am greeted with a soaked, slightly singed, very angry ex Turk.

"Well, the fires out…" I point out hopefully. His expression shows he is not at all grateful. Well at least our journeys off to a good start…

That night I think about Elena. The mission had gone well, no one had to be killed, and the owner gave in without a fuss. Lying in my bed I let my thoughts wander for the first time in a long time.

It seems strange now, but I knew her sister before her. That was back when the Turks really were a force to be reckoned with, there were fourteen of us. That was when we all had codenames, the only one whose real name I knew was Rude, because I'd known him before we joined the Turks, and Tseng, because he was second in command The codenames were for professionalism, to stop us getting to close. It worked, and I never had the same affection for "Gun (female)" as I did for Elena. They're dead now, eleven men and women, killed by meteorfall and the lifestream as they attempted to evacuate Midgar. Strange how after all the killing, it was saving lives that sent them to their death.

I remember hearing the news that she had replaced me. "It's only temporary" Tseng had said warily, knowing my difficulty in controlling my temper. "Just until you're out of hospital"

"It had better be" I had snarled at him from my hospital bed. Those AVALANCHE punks had beaten be pretty bad, but that didn't mean I wouldn't be up and about in a week at most. I wasn't having some jumped up little wannabe thinking she could take my place. To be honest, the thought terrified me. That job was all I had.

I hated her on sight. Her idiotic professionalism, always desperate to follow the rules, the way she was always messing up, her sheer naivety. What irked me most though was the way she looked at Tseng, like he was a fricking god. The way she would go all simpering and gooey around him, it made me sick.

What with the chaos of Sephiroth and then meteorfall, she ended up staying. I remember the end of it all, staring at the ruins of Midgar, realising our friends, our families, and over half of our colleagues just got wiped out. Her sister was one of them. I expected her to cry, scream, do something, but she just stood there. All that came after. She had always hated her sister, but now she was gone it hit her hard. She locked herself in her room in the house we had rented out, wouldn't come out for anyone. In the end I picked the lock. She started up from the bed where she had been lying, looking shocked and angry.

"Get the fuck out Reno" she has said coldly. I could see she had been crying.

"Elena, you can't stay in here forever" I replied, equally coldly. "What the hell gives you the right to sit in here moping, when the rest of us have to carry on with our lives?"

She had gasped at that, like I'd physically hurt her.

"My sister is dead" she said softly, dangerously. "She died believing I hated her"

"Sitting in here isn't going to help that" I snapped

"You don't understand! How could you understand?" she had yelled, tears beginning to spill over.

"Fucking hell Elena do you think you're the only one who's lost someone? My sister was in Midgar, my little baby sister. I haven't seen her in three years. She'd be nine years old by now, still a kid, whole life ahead of her. If she wasn't dead before she will be now. So don't you DARE say I don't understand"

"Reno…" she said softly. She had looked at me like I was a stranger she'd just met. There were tears running down her face, and she looked so pathetic I couldn't help it. I pulled a tissue out my pocket and wiped her face. I sat down on the bed beside her and to my surprise she put her face in my shoulder. Awkwardly I put my arm around her. After a few moments she had looked up at me.

"What happened?" she asked.

"What?" I replied confused

"Your sister" she said quietly

"She lived in the flat with me. I wasn't around much; she had to look after herself more or less. One day we went on a mission, and things didn't go to plan, ended up as hostages for about a week. When we got out and I got back to the flat, she was gone. I searched, but I never found her. A six year old out on the street… I doubt she survived long"

She hadn't said anything, but had nuzzled closer to my arm. After that we didn't hate each other as much. We got closer, and when I finally kissed her it just seemed natural. We were inseparable after that.

I remember that day up and the northern cave. She was down there with Tseng; I was waiting in the helicopter. I was jealous, she swore she was over Tseng, that it was just a pathetic infatuation, but I was still jealous. When I heard that gunshot, heard Tseng scream her name, my blood went cold.

When I saw her in that hospital bed, I thought my world would end. If she died, I would, that's what I decided. I remember her and Tseng saving Rufus, they had finally been deemed fit to leave the hospital, had come to join the fight, and got there just in the nick of time. But she wasn't better, neither of them were better, the damage went to deep. What destroyed me was that now; it was Tseng she turned to. Together they had been through something I couldn't understand, I would never understand, the horrors they had suffered at the hands of Kadaj and his gang. Together they faded away in a lonely corner of Kalm. When she died, I didn't have the courage to follow.

I drift off into an uneasy sleep. I dream I am back in the forgotten city, looking down at her broken body. But it's not Elena who lies there covered in blood, it's Yuffie.


End file.
